Don't Give A Mouse A Cookie

Merriam-Webster defines the term slippery slope as "a course of action that seems to lead inevitably from one action or result to another with unintended consequences."

Laura Joffre Numeroff and Felicia Bond's If You Give A Mouse A Cookie is perhaps the greatest story to explain what a slippery slope is. 

A kid gives a mouse a cookie, who then asks for a glass of milk to drink with the cookie, and then he asks for a straw to drink the milk. It goes on from there with a series of requests that ultimately ends up back to the mouse asking for another cookie and starting the cycle up again.

I bring up this story and the slippery slope analogy because Cartoon Network fanatics still want MeTV Toons to add CN's catalog to that channel because Cartoon Network no longer airs those shows, and, instead of demanding THAT network airs them, they'll complain at MeTV Toons, and anyone connected to the channel for NOT airing them. 

Seriously, since the day the network was announced, Cartoon Network fanatics have been whining consecutively, constantly, and consistently that MeTV Toons should air Cartoon Network originals. It's obnoxious and getting really old. And yet, with every boneheaded decision HBO Max and Warner Bros does with the Cartoon Network library, these cries are only getting louder and even more obnoxious.

And I hope by all things decent, Weigel Broadcasting, the owners of MeTV Toons, continues to ignore the hell out of these folks, don't give them anything at all, snuff that out real quick and just keep doing the great things they're already doing.

Before the fanatics start to light their torches and sharpen their pitchforks, I have to repeat something I've said many, many moons ago because it bears repeating:

Look, I get why some people want to see older Cartoon Network shows on MeTV Toons, I really do. But even that's a dual-edged sword for one factor: people would eventually want later and more recent shows as well.

You give audiences Dexter's Laboratory, Johnny Bravo, Cow and Chicken, and the Powerpuff Girls, they'll demand Ed, Edd 'n Eddy, Courage the Cowardly Dog, Codename: Kids Next Door, Ben 10, Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, Camp Lazlo, Juniper Lee, Flapjack, Chowder, Adventure Time, Gumball, Steven Universe, and so on. 

In short, they want to push out all the older cartoons and put Cartoon Cartoons all over MeTV TOONS, just like what happened to Cartoon Network in the 2000s.

History does not need to repeat itself. 

Even after I said that, the whining never stopped. Every time I see it, I hear the same old tiring bargaining from Cartoon Network fanatics.

"Those CN shows would get HUGE ratings on MeTV Toons."

I'm not even sure I buy that anymore.

Adult Swim aired Checkered Past, a block of Cartoon Network originals for about two years from 5 to 7 PM E/P on weekdays in the channel space that used to be primarily Cartoon Network not that long ago. It aired a myriad of shows that made up the so-called golden age of Cartoon Network, and after nearly two years, it's gone. 

If these shows guaranteed audiences and high ratings, it'd still be on the air. But the audience wasn't there, and the ratings weren't stable enough to justify its existence. 

Despite Checkered Past's failure, Cartoon Network fanatics still feel that MeTV Toons, which has been proven to be a fan-favorite success with older audiences thanks to its strong classic cartoon library of rarely-seen shows from the 1950s, 1960s, 1970s, 1980s, and a few from the 1990s and 2000s, should just drop most of that lineup and clog the channel with Cartoon Network originals.

At least, that's the vibe I get from them.

The truth is they don't really want MeTV Toons. 

They want Cartoon Network circa 2004 again.

"You have to put them on MeTV Toons because you can't find Cartoon Network shows anywhere else."

Sure you can. 

Here's a list of Cartoon Network shows that's currently on Fandango At Home (formerly VUDU).

Here's a list of Cartoon Network programming that's currently available on Hulu.

There are various show packages on Amazon Prime Video and Apple TV+. If you have linear cable, there's a few shows on demand. And hey, as I mentioned before, Cartoon Network still has a pretty steady lineup these days, and at the time of this writing (August 2025), Codename: Kids Next Door, the 2005 Ben 10, and Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends are on Boomerang while Steven Universe, Summer Camp Island, and We Baby Bears are also on Discovery Family.  It's not that these Cartoon Network shows are totally gone from linear TV. Granted, a lot of them were, but that's more on Cartoon Network's upper management and had been going on for decades.

Personally, if I were one of the higher muckity-mucks at The Warner Bros Company, I'd go into FAST media with the Cartoon Network library for a linear experience that would be in a lot more households than MeTV Toons, but that's just me. 

Also, do you know how you Cartoon Network fanatics sound asking MeTV Toons to air Cartoon Cartoons?

I know a lot of you are going through things right now, but a lot of you sound like this:

"Hey, could you put Friends, Seinfeld, ER, 30 Rock, Law & Order: SVU, and The Office on MeTV?"

"Why doesn't Antenna TV put on Everybody Loves Raymond, The King of Queens, The Big Bang Theory, Two and a Half Men, Two Broke Girls, and Young Sheldon on its lineup?"

"Catchy Comedy should just add The Simpsons, King of the Hill, Family Guy, American Dad, Bob's Burgers, and The Great North." 

That's how you guys sound when you constantly ask MeTV Toons to add Cartoon Network originals. 

"It's not the same, Jeff."

Of course, it is. You're asking an over-the-air digital classic television network to push aside rarely seen yet very popular programming in favor of fan-favorite shows that easily accessible and commercially available over-the-air and in the digital streaming marketplace. 

The only difference is that you're asking for cartoons instead of live-action shows. Never mind the fact that you're doing this for the lone over-the-air all-cartoon channel, and you feel justified with your constant and annoying demands like they owe you or something.

Get over yourself.

Oh, and if by some chance that MeTV Toons actually caves in and adds a handful of those shows, you won't be satisfied. Nope, a lot of you will feel empowered and get even more demanding. And do you know what will happen next?

"That's not fair only Cartoon Cartoons are on MeTV Toons. Why don't they also add Nicktoons like Rugrats, Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Rocko, Hey Arnold, Fairly Oddparents, and SpongeBob SquarePants?"

"Since they have Cartoon Network originals, why don't they try to get some old Disney Channel shows like Kim Possible, Dave the Barbarian, Brandy and Mr. Whiskers, Proud Family, Phineas and Ferb, Gravity Falls, and Big City Greens?"

"Why is only the Nicktoons on MeTV Toons? Give us old shows like Clarissa, Pete and Pete, All That, iCarly, and others?"

"Hey, that's not fair that old Nick shows are there, put Lizzie McGuire, Hannah Montana, That's So Raven, Suite Life, and other classic Disney Channel shows too!"

You see what I mean when I talk about giving a mouse a cookie? 

Adding Cartoon Network originals would be the beginning of a slippery slope that would ultimately kill MeTV Toons, and I'm not even kidding.

You ask for one thing, others are going to ask for other things, and the original mission of airing older classic cartoons for the Baby Boomer, Generation X, and early Millennial audiences (you know, the folks who actually still WATCH over-the-air television) of MeTV Toons would be gone. 

That's what killed the original Boomerang, and I'll be damned if we lose MeTV Toons the same way. 

As I said, I understand your frustrations about what's going on with Cartoon Network, but instead of constantly throttling MeTV Toons with requests to air them, COMPLAIN TO CARTOON NETWORK INSTEAD!

And I hope MeTV Toons continues to not give these mice cookies.