Oh, Right, Cartoon Network Still Exists

I've been talking about MeTV Toons for about a month now (and there's no guarantee it'll even come to my part of the world) that I kind of forgot about the dumpster fire that is Cartoon Network right now. 

Okay, I haven't forgotten about the channel. There's not much to talk about, at least when it comes to the main brand. The Total Drama Island revival premiered on the channel nearly a year after it premiered in basically every major international market. Craig of the Creek is premiering its final cycle of episodes. 

And, well, that's pretty much it in regard to the main Cartoon Network brand. Adult Swim has been a lot livelier thanks to a cycle of Ninja Kamui and various acquisitions on Toonami and season premieres of Smiling Friends and My Adventures of Superman, my favorite show on the block right now. Oh, and Toonami expanded to Friday afternoons by adding the Viz-dubbed Sailor Moon and encores of Dragon Ball Z Kai and Naruto. Even Boomerang has been lively with sporadic returns of various Hanna-Barbera and Warner Bros shows on the channel by comparison.

Cartoon Network is just... there. An 11-hour block connected to a 13-hour Adult Swim network. Rumors of shows heading exclusively to Adult Swim rather than the core Cartoon Network block has deflated the older fans of the channel even though - GASP - they're literally NOT the demographic the Cartoon Network block targets.

Okay, yeah, the main channel is still called Cartoon Network, and Cartoon Network is NOT a block on the Adult Swim channel. That said, there is a lot of similarities with what happened at Toon Disney when Jetix encroached its lineup ultimately infecting a bulk of the lineup to the point that it killed it and transformed it into Disney XD. 

It's pretty boring when it comes to Cartoon Network. The more high-profile shows are on MAX. Some shows are on Netflix and Hulu. Some are on the Cartoon Network app, which, despite what some folks will tell you, is pretty decent and has quite a variety of shows on it, many of which are available without the need for a cable subscription. And yet, when it comes to the channel's library, despite the availability of a bulk of it across various streamers and digital platforms and storefronts, and a few actually airing on Adult Swim, Cartoon Network, and Boomerang, there's still a handful of folks whining about wanting Cartoon Network Studios shows on MeTV Toons, which I don't feel need to be on a classic cartoon channel largely aimed towards older adults. 

And boy, do I get comments about having that opinion.

"But the early CN originals were made by Hanna-Barbera." Yeah, but they were made for Cartoon Network explicitly, and I feel there's a VAST library of Hanna-Barbera shows that are in the library that deserves to be shared and seen by audiences before something that is more easily accessible and prominent nearly everywhere. 

"Wouldn't Cartoon Network originals be considered old enough for MeTV Toons?" Some would, yeah, but the ones that would fit MeTV Toon's lineup are already prominent on the Checkered Past block on Adult Swim. And most are in those places I mentioned earlier. 

 "Dude, grow up. You're a f*king virgin who talks way too much about cartoons." Nothing wrong with talking about things I dig. I just happen to appreciate animation as an artform and as a form of storytelling entertainment. Also, haven't been a virgin since the Clinton Administration. I just don't talk about what (and who) I do offline because you don't have to be open about what you do to an anonymous audience. Stop thinking about my junk, you sad little dinkus.

"Okay, you don't want Cartoon Network stuff on MeTV Toons. Where do you want to see them (and don't give me that excuse that you can see them on MAX or the Cartoon Network App because MAX is unreliable and the CN App sucks)?" As controversial and weird as the concept may seem, perhaps... Cartoon Network? I know, I know, Cartoon Network shows on Cartoon Network is an alien concept, but it's not like they don't have timeslots to air them. They actually have three linear outlets they could air them: Cartoon Network/Adult Swim, Boomerang, and Discovery Family. No, I'm not crazy. There's legitimately no reason why Discovery Family couldn't air Cartoon Network originals, especially since it's currently under the direction of Cartoon Network, Inc. Weird, I know. And despite what a weird minority of you think, it's not David Zaslav's fault they're not prominent on those channels. That said, I'm not blind to the fact that the viewership there is on the decline and most of the target demographics are online. So, I'll make this proposal:

Create Cartoon Network-branded FAST channels. 

I'll talk about that in depth in the next post in the next post.