Thoughtnami™

Once upon a time, there were four networks. One was an orphaned network that struggled a bit when they were growing up trying to find an identity. He didn't like his name, Nimby. He spent the sixties trying to find out who he is, started wearing colorful clothes that people didn't get at first, hung out with spacemen, and ended up found in the haze of the hippie counterculture. He felt good, but he realized they had to grow up, so, they did some soul-searching, figuring out what's out there. Seeing what works and what doesn't. He found himself back in the counterculture again, though they limited their parties to Saturday nights. After a few rough spots, he cleaned himself up, was proud as a peacock, and now called himself Pete. During the booming 80s, he hung out with a lot of rich folks with kids, taxi drivers, doctors, students, families, cops, barkeeps, mercenaries, lawyers, and judges. At the turn of the decade, they shied away from those people and lived a singl...

It wasn't supposed to be this easy. A year ago, they were just kids. Without purpose. Without hope. Looking for answers to questions that plagued their minds. Looking to belong to something bigger than themselves. Five kids who I've helped mold into the best chance this lost land has to offer. For one year, I've trained them to become warriors. I've taught them how to fight without fighting, but I also didn't want them to get their rears handed over to them either. The big one's like my son. He came to me because I knew his father. I fought and trained alongside him in a previous life. I won't bore you with the details now, that's for another time. He is the most balanced of the quintet, shows precision with weapons and bare hands. The blonde is quick, even-tempered. She's a little headstrung, but lately, she holds herself back. She's not afraid, but nowadays, she knows there's consequences for her actions. Shame she's just learning that ...

I like USA. I do. If the wags get their way and NBC goes cable through its new majority owner Comcast, I shall miss USA because I don't see them keeping a cable-only NBC and USA, unless they become like Time Warner's TBS and TNT networks, but better. But that's not what I'm writing this article about. The tagline of USA for the past four or five years is "Characters Welcome." It's a catchy tagline, especially when they showcase folks of all walks of life. Of course on air, the characters that are present at seemingly all hours are detectives. There are detectives that are behind the badge. There are detectives that are freelancers, albeit with a few personality quirks. There are detectives that are fake psychics. There are detectives who work for the government. There are medical detectives who find out what's killing you from the inside. There are medical detectives who discover who and what killed you from the outside. There are detectives who are co...

The following would be considered a rambling discussion by critics, so be warned. I use a lot of words that could make your head hurt if you can't handle it. Reader discretion is strongly advised to those that can't handle it. I've been thinking. Is television, as my generation and the generations before mine knew it, coming to an end? I know we're in a new digital era where those without special sets or converters to watch television over the airwaves can't watch without the use of cable/satellite/fiber-optic services. That not what I'm talking about. I guess you've all heard that NBC Universal, or at least most of the company, may become part of the Comcast family in a matter of months, provided they could get a deal straightened out and overcome trade obstacles. There are also strong rumors that the NBC television network may end up becoming a cable-only outlet somewhere down the line as a result of the, opening up the possibility that the other three maj...

I've been writing on the internet for close to 12 years, either on Usenet, message boards, or my sites (and sites of my friends). You want to know how much money I've made for my articles over these dozen years? $0.00 That's zero dollars and no sense. In fact, I'm actually in the red by about $40. That's how much I paid for three years of my domain renewal and ICANN fees. Why am I telling you all of this? Well, apparently the Federal Trade Commission said that effective on December 1, all bloggers/writers must disclose whether they're getting compensation (either monetary or products). I don't get any money from anybody. I did receive DVDs and books back when I was reviewing, but they were only 10% of what I reviewed. The other 90% I spent money on and reviewed of my own expense. I don't get review material anymore, and considering how expensive they are, I have to wait a long time before they become affordable. Again, I don't make an income from my...

Fifty-two weeks ago tonight, the final broadcast of Toonami aired on Cartoon Network. While I am a little saddened that the block is no longer on the air, I would like to make the following statement: The world did not end. Sure, there are folks walking around with a dazed look on their faces, wide-eyed, and still convinced that Toonami will return and return sooner rather than later. Never mind the fact that in its final months, the four-hour block was cut down to a late-primetime lineup with one show airing the much-loathed filler episodes and reruns from the network. Cartoon Network and Viz had a falling out of some kind, which somehow affected the kid-friendly Shonen Jump titles that aired on the block, including Funimation's One Piece. So, what exactly happened in the 52 weeks between the end of Toonami and tonight? ADV Films went out of business. Disney bought Marvel. Toon Disney became Disney XD and the new home of Spectacular Spider-Man and soon Naruto Shippuden. Disney bou...

Previously on Thoughtnami, I talked about how moronic Cartoon Network has become in recent months, especially when it comes to the even more moronic CNReal experiment which has been proven to be a critical failure and the reason the network's ratings have tumbled 29% in primetime, where they're no longer in the top 10, let alone the top 20 in cable networks. This was a few weeks ago. Since that jaw-shattering announcement, Cartoon Network did some soul searching and actually brought some old favorites back to the lineup in marathon form. Ratings bumped up a lot, and they're still doing that. But you have to wonder what brought that moment of clarity at Cartoon Network. I'm sure something along these lines was said within Techwood in some variation or another: "Viewers don't like the fact that we crammed ripoffs of Ghost Hunters, Survivorman, Junkyard Wars, and Cash Cab down their collective throats at every open slot we had." "Those repeats of Slambal...

To say that I was shocked to hear about yesterday's death of legendary film writer, producer, and director John Hughes would be a massive understatement. Much of my entire childhood was spent watching his movies on cable and that new-fangled thing called VCRs, and the non-conformist, trend-ignoring, path-unfollowing person you see before you (well, the person whose words you're currently reading) was solidified by those lessons learned from those movies. Loved them all. The Breakfast Club. Sixteen Candles. Weird Science. Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. Uncle Buck. The Great Outdoors. Vacation. Christmas Vacation. Home Alone. Curly Sue. Ferris Bueller's Day Off. I think above everything Mr. Hughes ever put his creative input on, it's that movie that pretty much set the standard for the way I want to live my life. I've realized that, in reality, I'm actually more like Cameron, and even today, I'm still like that. I always wanted to be Ferris, and I guess in ...

Hypothetically speaking, you own a channel. A channel whose primary focus was to air one particular medium at all hours of the day. Let's call this medium "balloons." The medium also makes up your channel's first name. Now these "balloons" are initially built up of stuff you already have in your possession, and then you begin to make your own stuff. It's mostly "balloons," but you do experiment with another kind of programming called "needles," often mixing them up with the "balloons," but "needles" weren't dominant on the channel. Again, hypothetically speaking, fans of "balloons" and creators of "balloons" grew to love the "balloon channel." They started showing "balloons" from all over the world. Some viewers liked the "balloons" that came from Japan. Now, 13 years had passed, and management noticed that while older viewers were still watching "balloons,...

real : adj. 1. not artificial, fraudulent, or illusory: GENUINE. 2. of or relating to practical or everyday activities 3. occurring or existing in actuality. We're hours away from Cartoon Network's umpteenth pandering of Nickelodeon and The Disney Channel's usual audience while ignoring the successes of the past year with the exception of Total Drama Island and Clone Wars. Cartoon Network is still showing animation, but lately, it seems that animation is being pushed aside as are the small yet loyal fans of the network in favor of identity-changing programming and a persona that sheds everything that is genuinely Cartoon Network. In short, while Cartoon Network is getting Real, Cartoon Network isn't keeping it real. Let me explain. On Wednesday, Cartoon Network is launching a new live-action block of programming they're calling CN Real. They're airing a teen version of Sci Fi's Ghost Hunters called The Othersiders and a teen version of Discovery's Surviv...

In case you've been living in a cave for the past few years, tomorrow (June 12) marks the day the United States enters the digital television age. Television as we have known it since forever will change. If you have cable or satellite, you won't notice the change. If you rely on antennas (antennae?), well, I hope you have either a digital-ready set or a digital converter box to watch the new crystal clear era of television. I have to admit that aside from my PBS and ION affiliates, I'm not getting the additional channels as promised by the ads. Universal Sports, RTN, ThisTV, and Funimation sound pretty sweet. Then again, as the following short from Tex Avery will show you, the television of tomorrow was supposed to have many changes, though Tex and company were right on the money on a few of the predictions. Enjoy this MGM classic, The TV of Tomorrow: Postscript: I'm not infringing on the copyrights of Turner Entertainment, owners of this short, but considering they ar...

Over the next few weeks, I'm presenting Quick Waves, where I talk about a few spurts of thought that come to mind that I would talk about at length, but since I'm in the middle of totally revamping The X Bridge (it's not just a facelift, cats and kittens), I could only write small bytes. Here comes something: - How come I didn't know that Elmore Leonard wrote a CHILDREN'S book? The guy behind Out of Sight , Rum Punch , Get Shorty , 52 Pickup , 3:10 To Yuma , and countless novels wrote A Coyote's In The House , a great story about a ravenous yet slick coyote named Antwan and a pampered, retired German shepherd actor named Buddy, who decide to switch lives. A pretty damned good book at any age (and probably the first published instance of the correct use of the word "bitch," a female canine), so pick it up. And this seems like something that could easily translate to animation. The old Disney, before they got preoccupied with teen sexpots and computer an...

Have you heard that there's a new host of The Tonight Show on NBC? Like our current president, he served as a head of a prestigious Harvard University group (he was the president of the Harvard Lampoon, one of only three to serve in the role twice). He's a former comedy writer for Saturday Night Live and The Simpsons and a two-time Emmy winner and three-time host. He's freakishly tall like his favorite president , kind of looks like the current president of Finland , and made a grown man say "Buddy Boy" and "Jub-Jub" during the World Series. Did I mention he hosted his own late-night talk show for 15 and a half years? Conan O'Brien has only been host of The Tonight Show for a week, but he's doing pretty well in the slot. The fans of Late Night With Conan O'Brien loved the revamped Tonight Show, but many of the show's critics are complaining that his show is nothing more than Late Nigh t with a bigger shinier set and that he's un...

Washington. Lincoln. FDR. Reagan. Franklin. If I had my way, those faces would be on the faces of the banknotes of the United States. The first President. The President who fought to keep the nation together. The President who brought hope to the hopeless. The President who thawed the Cold War. One of the major architects of this great nation. I blame the Dollar ReDeSign Project for inspiring me to do these redesigns in the first place.

In case you haven't heard, CBS Corporation is not only dropping the Paramount name from their television division name (now they're CBS Television Studios), but they're also launching a new film studio, CBS Films . This isn't CBS's first foray into original film production (they were one of the "stars" in Tri-Star Pictures, with Columbia Pictures and HBO being the other two). The whole purging of the Paramount culture at CBS shouldn't be so surprising, especially since folks at Paramount Pictures' parent company are doing likewise with the CBS culture after announcing plans to launch a premium cable network called Epix that's basically housing Paramount, Lionsgate, and MGM films. Of course Showtime, the CBS-owned premium network that had exclusive access to those films, weren't thrilled, and its future could be in doubt. But here's the thing. Viacom and CBS Corporation are separate corporations, and yet, they're still owned by Sumne...

I'm not fond of cherrypicking nor, as Jon Stewart so eloquently said the other day, turdmining anything. I don't want to snark or get bitter over anything. Everybody that knows me says I'm a pretty good guy. Most days, I'm happy, free to be me, and enjoy life. Other days, I'm a little ticked, and I unleash hell on those that I feel have made it a point to make my day miserable. This is one of those days. Recently-minted president of SciFi Channel, Dave Howe, just held an upfront earlier this morning . They celebrated the fact that the network had its best year ratingswise ever (they're in 13th place in ad-supported networks and in the top 10 with viewers 18-49 and 25-56, so Cartoon Network, stop whining, you're still doing well despite not having Nick and Disney-sized numbers). They spent time talking about their new series Warehouse 13 (essentially Eureka in South Dakota) and hinted about their new endeavor that will translated to a subscription-based MMORP...

I never expected my 200th post here at Thoughtnami would be talking about the live-action Dragon Ball movie. I also never expected to have 200 posts here in the first place because, let's face it. I have a web site, The X Bridge . It has been around for over a decade, and as much as I love that domain, I'm a little more comfortable here because it's more freeflowing and less constricted. While THAT site is currently up, it's evolving into something a bit more creative. I have over 500 pages of articles and such accumulated there, and a I'm changing it into more of a creative outlet, but I can't reveal anything until it happens, so updates there are sporadic to say the least. In the meantime, I'm posting here, where the living is easy, and I can write when I want and about whatever I want and not worry about getting my hosts in trouble. So, for all of you readers who've checked out Thoughtnami in the nearly five years and 200 posts, I thank you all. Now,...

Whatever happened to entertainment? It's not like the world isn't bombarded by an endless 24-hour news cycle. It is. NBC, Fox, and CNN all dominate the national news scene in this country, and the fact that some digital networks are dedicating themselves to news is kind of irksome. The broadcast networks have really dropped the ball on subchannel development in the new digital order because they've completely abandoned entertainment. Despite what Fox News, CNBC, and Headline News tell you, news is not entertainment. It's news. The major broadcast networks (ABC, NBC, CBS, and Fox) are owned by Disney, NBC Universal, CBS Paramount, and News Corp, monolithic entertainment companies with a vast library of shows, movies, and specials for all ages. The thing isn't that they can't create outlets airing those shows but rather they won't. Why won't they? The television industry is cheap. Even before the depression started, the television industry is powered by ch...

I get it now. Adult Swim is going in a different direction than a lot of fans would want it. Just because they're going into that direction doesn't mean they should be going in the direction headfirst, blindfolded, and falling in the direction of jagged glass shards and rusted nails. I do wish that Adult Swim wasn't the only avenue for the shows "we" want. Despite all their valiant moves to prove otherwise in recent years, they're still a part of Cartoon Network and are still largely handcuffed by the management of Cartoon Network, Turner, and Time Warner who largely sees Adult Swim as a diversion from their core mission of remaining third in the kid-vid market. If I was a prospective media company with pocket change to spend like, say, NBC Universal, I'd create a 24-hour Adult Swim-like channel with animation, sitcoms, movies, etc. (reruns of Late Night with Conan O'Brien and SNL would be a killer app for the channel, especially since we'll never ...

In this world, you have to know one thing: Always know where your towel is. Why yes, I have become a Douglas Adams fan as of late. Those three and a half months without a real computer helped me catch up on a lot of things offline. Aside from the personal things that still depresses me, I've been reading a lot. The Bible (the KJV and SJV), Crimson, the Hitchhiker Trilogy (which is actually five books, not unlike the Jersey Trilogy of Kevin Smith that began with Clerks and ended with the sixth movie, Clerks 2), and a few others. That whole conversation between Arthur and Ford before the Earth got destroyed was a strange one, but it resonated with me. A towel is, more or less, everything. It's protection. It's a weapon. It could be used for communication. It keeps you dry. It's everything. I've figured out that in this life, you've got to know who to trust and who you can't. I know I could trust my family because they're there for me in good times and bad ...

It's fun to watch banking CEOs squirm in their chairs while being bombarded with questions. I'd love to see what would happen if the Big Media types were in the same situation. Here's what I'd ask my "friend" Jeff Bewkes of Time Warner: Where the hell did the $24 billion go in the last quarter? And don't say it all went into a lawsuit, which was largely dismissed and cost $300 million. Where did it go? What's the point of having an animation studio if they're not producing any series for television and you sit on the library, not even airing them on the TWO animation networks currently owned by the company (and don't get me started by the idiotic decision to drop Kids' WB on-air)? Not counting the Cartoon Network-produced animated productions and the DC Comics adaptations (including Batman: The Brave and the Bold, which is both), there are zero productions coming out of Warner Bros. Animation on television. Are you even aware that the origi...

Television is great. You don't know how great it is. I can see the potential in the industry that a lot of individuals who work in the medium still doesn't see. Money blinds a lot of folks, and at times they need an outsider looking in for them to understand how it can be greater without focusing so much on "what's in it for me and my bosses." They have created great cable channels over the last four decades. Nickelodeon and ESPN, two of the cornerstones of the industry, both celebrate their 30th anniversary of their national launch this year. However, the industry has turned niche-channels into something that has, admittedly, gone downhill. Here's a sampler of those channels: Cartoon Network - Although, admittedly, they have gotten better over the last year, but they still have this need to become everything for every kid and still hung up on live-action creation. And canceling original animated shows isn't leaving me with much confidence. MTV - Is unwatc...

Saw this over at Mr. Evanier's site , and I couldn't resist trying it myself: Twenty questions. Start with the same letter as your first name. You're not allowed to repeat an answer and if you're "tagged" by someone whose name starts with the same first letter, you can't repeat any of their answers, either. Here's what I came up with... 1. What is your name: Jeff 2. A four letter word: Joke 3. A boy's name: John 4. A girl's name: Jane 5. An occupation: Janitor 6. A color: Jade 7. Something you wear: Jeans 8. A food: Jelly Bellys 9. Something found in the bathroom: Jars 10. A place: JANAF Shopping Center (Google it) 11. A reason for being late: Job duties 12. Something you shout: "Jackass!" 13. A movie title: Jarhead 14. Something you drink: Jolt 15. A musical group: Journey 16. An animal: Jackal 17. A street name: Juniper Drive 18. A type of car: Jaguar 19. A song title: "Judy in Dis...

Gu'ils mangent de la brioche. - Marie-Therese 1638-1683. Not Marie Antoinette I think they're still teaching world history in American schools, so that quote may sound familiar, if not in its French incarnation, then definitely in its English pseudo-translation, "Let them eat cake." Most often, this quote is seen as a sign of ignorance, arrogance, and elitism, a feeling of being above others. I'm assuming you've heard that the digital transition date has been "largely moved" to June 12 (though broadcasters can still turn off their analog signals on February 17, and those reading this in the state of Hawaii and the city of Wilmington, North Carolina are already in the digital age in the US). But I'm shocked and kind of appalled to see a sense of elitism come out in a lot of people in regards to this topic. I've read a lot of postings on television news sites and quotes from politicians who are convinced that 99% of Americans are already ready ...

I wrote this back at the Adult Swim forums many moons ago, but it's something that's stuck in my brain. It's pertaining to something I never understood about the whole Time Warner company infrastructure. Why don't Warner Bros. Animation and Turner Entertainment work TOGETHER on projects more often than they do. No, not just on kid-friendly DC Comic adaptations or spinoffs for Cartoon Network. How about both separate sibling companies working together to co-develop original action animation for the [adult swim] brand? Animation isn't just limited to kid-vid, as [adult swim] as proven for a little over six years now. It doesn't always have to be the latest and the lamest from Japan ALL the time. Just because it's premade doesn't mean it's always going to be good. If anything, I think the core audience would actually want to see something original on the block from time to time. The anime acquisitions are fine, but in essence, they're reruns. Not re...

In the light of a recent deal that Lionsgate recently completed to buy TV Guide for $1, I'd like to present an offer to the shumagorath that is Time Warner. I want to buy broadcasting and distribution rights to the non-DC Comics/Cartoon Network-owned animated properties from Warner Bros for $100. Yes, this is a small amount on the onset, but hear me out. I know Time Warner is in dire financial straits because of mismanagement from the top down and are looking to downsize and diverse some properties from their library. Over the past decade, they shed their music, publishing, cable service, and secondary magazine labels as well as collapsed New Line Cinema into Warner Bros. Pictures. I'm not interested in those properties but rather their underutilized unit, Warner Bros. Animation. Let's face it. It doesn't really exist anymore aside from being an outlet producing adaptations of DC Comics titles. I think they're on the fifth or sixth incarnation of Batman now, and I...

I found myself singing the "Charles In Charge" theme song today. Maybe it was because of a recent commercial that had a guy singing part of it in this answer service with a Soviet-sounding name. It just came to me out of the blue, and it kind of scared me. Then, I realized why it scared me. They don't make theme songs like they used to. Nature of the industry, I guess. Everybody wants to just get to the show, and get it over with so they could promote the next show. Some channels *cough*TBS and TNT*cough* don't even wait for the show to be over to jump to the next show. Credits are already at a point that you need a magnifying glass to find out who does key animation or sound editing on a series. Theme songs are supposed to be the familiar refrain that serves to invoke a show's memory just by hearing it. Whether it's a story theme (a song that tells you the general plot of a series if you've never seen the series - think "The Brady Bunch," "...